English for scammers

Scammers may need an English language course to be able to write convincing sentences but this is NOT a course that English4Today will be creating!

Most of us get a lot of spam every day and it’s become a daily chore deleting emails that have slipped past the spam blockers and filters. It’s very rare that I get an obvious scam email and feel like sharing it with the world but this one is the exception and I have to thank ‘Pansy’ (what an excellent name for a scammer!) for sending me this.

Of course, it’s the language that I love … I don’t think I really need to say much more … I’ll just let you enjoy it as well!

Sir/Madam,

Your current situation has been discussed to the compulsory commissions, and upon conscientious consideration, we are able to offer to you the subsequent prospect.

Based upon conscientious consideration you make the grade to receive a openhanded benefit on your primary property investment.

By completing the subsequent attached form in a timely manner we will be able to complete our assessment, and we feel firm you will receive not only a reduced rate of interest, but also a cash return that will carry out all your holiday needs and more!

With kindest regards,

Pansy Bell

How many spelling, grammar and vocabulary mistakes did you pick up? You can leave your answers in the comments section.

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